I have not written in a while. I don’t know why, so much has happened that is exciting , new, crazy, weird, and some things I just have to shake my head at. I feel like I have come full circle only to start over, does that make sense? I am starting over only better and more focused. I have accomplished some amazing goals and I look forward to seeing what else I can achieve. My main goal is focus and making sure it makes sense. I also have to be more lateral in my moves to begin to work towards the ” Big Bang” , nope I have no clue what that is.
I am working on this “Unconditional Love” thing, I wake every morning and set my intention but by midday I wanna punch somebody in their “Unconditional love”. I have also been in my head more within the past couple of weeks I hate it. Even though I go there I still hate when I realized that is where I’ve been for like 10 minutes of my life thinking about some random BS. The hardest part in all of this is to be patient and under stand that retraining the Body, Mind and Spirit will not happen over night.
I need to be in my own space for the rest of this journey and I need to figure out how to get there. My thoughts are so all over the place right now. I will write more soon.
I finally finished reading A New Earth by Eckhart Toll . I do love this book it was really good towards the end. It is one of those books that you keep handy. I learned so much and now how so many questions. One of my favorite things at the end was “The three Modalities of Awakened Doing” , this helped me tremendously, the funny thing is that I was already doing them to a point. When you shift your thought process it has a tremendous impact on your life. Your outlook and so many things are completely transformed. I can see the transformation but I still know that I have much work to do. I know I have not hit my base line, there a few more thing that I need to workout. I am eager for more knowledge. I plan to continue to increase my vibration, this journey has me so excited. I have finally started meditation consistently and trying to incorporate Yoga( this is funny). I have been able to remove a few things from my life that no longer served me. I did it with ease, which blows me away every time I think about it. My concentration now is on everything positive, joyful, enthusiasm, and all things happiness. Good Day!!
The most powerful statement that I read today: You are a Magnet, When you become a magnet of love, you attract love. When you become a magnet of Joy, you attract Joy. When you become a magnet of Health , you attract health. You must become the magnet of whatever it is you want, to bring it to you. Attraction is the First step . Manifestation is the effect of the magnet of you.
Before my mind starts to rumble thru the Jungle in the morning. I manage to repeat “everything always work out for me” several times which leads to me repeating the rest of my morning affirmations. I am proud of my self because this morning I realized that it has become a habit. I am so proud of that. In the car I am also repeating affirmation or listening to positive uplifting information to guide me thru my day.
I am currently working on bad habits/ distractions. I have removed or stopping using most social media apps. I still have the gram. I removed all my games except for one and working on quitting smoking. I have so many other positive things that I need to put my time into like finishing one of the 4 books I am reading., meditation, exercising, detoxing and just fine tuning myself. I definitely have to cut off the television. Once I am in good groove going with letting go some of my other vices I will just unplug the television.
I have been a little anxious at night. Mind racing, it seems harder at night to refocus. I know the things that have my mind racing so I have to really refocus away from that.
Overall I am proud of myself thus far. I still have a lot of work to do and it’s a slow process but everyday is a day to gain more knowledge of self and to overcome and shed the old me.
We are coming into a new month already. I swear someone hit a button and increased how fast time flies by like 50%. My goal next month is to focus on Self care, focus on the person I want to become and live life. I learned a lot about the person I am today versus the person I want to be. I have to come to some conclusions and really see what I was doing to myself and allowing in my life. I also understand why I kept drawing the same type of people in my life, this was a big eye opener. I am happy to say that I am finally content with being alone. It only took 43 years. I no longer have that drive to be in relationship. It feels rather good to not worry about that.
ok on another note, this meditation thing, I been avoiding it because it is so hard to stop the thoughts and yes I know, you only get better with practice but sometimes it is so daunting. I promise my self that I will put forth more effort cause I know that is help me immensely.
It is Friday, I am going home to be a lump and what Star Trek and old black and white movies. Have a wonderful weekend!!